Part I: The Case of the Porcelain Ferret

It was a Tuesday, which—as everyone in the know understands—is statistically the most treacherous day for artefact theft. The fog clung to the cobblestones like a clingy aunt at a wedding, and the clocktower struck thirteen. No one batted an eyelid. Timekeeping was more of a polite suggestion in 1887.

At exactly 7:03 a.m., something rather unforgivable occurred at Just a Shop, Sir: the prized Porcelain Ferret of Farthingdale vanished.

Vanished.

No broken locks. No dusty footprints. No note. Just a faint smell of cinnamon and treason.

The Victim

Lady Agatha Pimm-Pott, heiress to the entire Teacake District and collector of rare ceramic mammals, was beside herself.

"It had such soulful little eyes," she wept into a lace handkerchief the size of a small gazebo. "And a monocle! A monocle, Inspector!"

The monocled ferret (full name: Lord Snuffington III) had been the centrepiece of her collection. Rumour had it the piece was so rare, it had been stolen twice before—once by a rogue bishop, once by a squirrel.

The Suspects

Enter: Inspector Percival T. Jumblesworth, noted for his impressive moustache and utter lack of deductive skill. He arrived on the scene in full regalia, including his ceremonial investigation trousers (double-pleated, naturally).

He made the following list of suspects:

• Barnaby the Butler – suspiciously well-dressed and knows how to open cabinets

• Esmeralda the Archivist – once described the ferret as “hideous”

• Reginald “Stickyfingers” Poppycock – local thief with a passion for ornamental rodents

• The Ghost of Thistlewick’s Founder – frequently blamed for tea going missing

The Clue

Only one thing was left behind: a single calling card bearing the mark of The Collector—a mythical figure whispered about at boot sales and high-society swap meets.

Known only by their velvet gloves and an irrational fear of marzipan, The Collector is said to acquire objects of obscure value... often at midnight... and usually by climbing through chimneys.

But what would The Collector want with a porcelain ferret in a top hat?

Next Time in The Great Collectable Heist of 1887:

• A secret passage behind the gramophone!

• A coded message baked into a crumpet!

• And Reginald Poppycock gets stuck in a decorative urn!